I'm holding back the tears (-_-)

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(~_~)
Last three day was the saddest thing that ever happens to me. My grandmother (on my father side) has gone forever. Now I don't know who I will confess my problem with. Me and my twin was really shock as family from my father side called us one day after my grandmother has passed away....which this make me feel really sad and wondering why they didn't tell us on the first place. Well their reason was everything was mess up and they're also shock.... (Yeah right...)


So I went there at my fathers place with my twin but the sad things are we  not be able to look at grandma for the last time.....and I will never forget what my grandmother told me when was a kid " there’s always obstacles ahead of your journey, but try to face it with dignity and confidently. Try not to show your tears in front of your enemy or you may look  weak! Back to the story, there we help all our relatives to prepare the food for the visitors and friends. I can't even talk because at the moment I was holding back the tears and my heart was really painful...

Some of my cousin tries to cheer me up but I end up crying until I got eye bags....Eww...

2 days later we came back from my father’s house and everything went back to normal (talk about man of habit...) as usual we greet our family (mother side) but I didn't saw my mom. Well I guest she's at work…Whatever.
At that night, when she came back from work she suddenly piss off and shout angrily toward me and my sister which that has never happen before!! She said that as if everything is our fault and told us that if you don't want to stay in the house we better we go back to your father's house a.s.a.p. FYI mom, what the hell is going on with you? We were just trying visiting your ex- mother in law who passed away two days ago. Is that wrong? It’s not like we went there and you think we straightly want to stay there for the rest of our live? HELL TO THE NO!

For the record even though you told to go to our father’s house, we will never go there because we are belong there, with you mom.... Thanks for telling us how stupid we are become your daughter... Now I realize how much you hate us compare to the other child, right? All the bad word you spread in front of my brothers and sisters really make me feel disappointed. If you like us to leave, we'll go. Fine by me. I'll quit college, find a work and be independent.

To tell you the truth mom, I sometimes hate it when you do that. Sometimes all the bad word you throw to us can be quiet offensive. I don’t think I could forgive you because of that…..it just too painful to accept. I guest reality was really are….. (Sigh).

There’s only one thing I want to express to you mom, please try control your temper and not to yell out loud in front of everybody. Have you ever thinking about our feeling when you said that? As a parent please try talk professionally as we are consider adult too NOT kids...(-_-)